Marriage is indeed something special, so when it comes to wedding anniversaries, it’s important that we commemorate them.
While finding unique anniversary gifts may be relatively easy, coming up with the right words to express how you feel about marriage, whether it be your marriage or someone else’s, can often be challenging.
Take a look at some of the most inspirational funny anniversary quotes that we’ve come up with. We’re here to help you celebrate a blessed union with a good old belly laugh…
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Funny Anniversary Quotes
If you are writing an anniversary card or speech and want to add a bit of humour to it, these funny anniversary quotes add a light-hearted edge.
- “99% of being married is just shouting ‘WHAT?’ from other rooms.” – Anonymous
- “It is remarkable how long we have tolerated each other for.” – Anonymous
- “Marriage: when dating goes too far.” – Anonymous
- “Sorry, no refunds! Happy anniversary!” – Anonymous
- “I’ll love you even when you’re old and wrinkly” – Anonymous
- “Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener” – Anonymous
- “I love you more than carbs but less than cheese!” – Anonymous
- “I love you. Thanks for killing all the spiders this year.” – Anonymous
- If love is an amazing dream, then marriage is the alarm clock.” – Anonymous
- “The four most important words in any marriage: I’ll do the dishes.” – Anonymous
- “On our anniversary, let’s celebrate being one year closer to death do us part.” – Anonymous
- “For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end.” – Catherine Zeta-Jones
- “When someone is murdered, the police investigate the spouse first. That tells you everything you need to know about marriage.” – Katherine Hepburn.
Funny Anniversary Wishes For Husbands
If you are looking for the perfect funny anniversary quotes for your husband, look no further than this list.
- “I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They have experienced pain and bought jewellery.” – Rita Rudner
- “Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you are looking for, go and live with a car battery.” – Erma Bombeck
- “Marriage is basically just whispering, ‘Are you awake? I need to show you this cat video.’” – Anonymous
- “An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have: the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.” – Agatha Christie
- “Unless you want to forget about your marriage, it’s a good idea to remember your anniversary.” – Melanie White
- “Drug stores understand life. That’s why the anniversary cards and sympathy cards are right next to each other.” – Anonymous
- “Some people ask the secret to our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing… she goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.” – Henry Youngman
- “Marrying a man is like buying something you’ve been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn’t always go with everything else.” – Jean Kerr
- “I love you more than coffee, but please don’t make me prove it.” – Elizabeth Evans
- “Marriage is a lot like the army. Everyone complains, but you’d be surprised at the large number that re-enlists.” – James Garner
- “If we take matrimony at its lowest, we regard it as a sort of friendship recognised by the police.” – Robert Louis Stevenson
- “Happy anniversary! I want to spend the rest of my money with you.” – Anonymous
Here’s to another year of loving, laughing and putting up with each other’s mothers! Happy anniversary to you, my darling husband. I love you.
Funny Anniversary Wishes For Your Wife
Finding the perfect mix of funny anniversary quotes for your wife can be a tricky task. Our list of funny anniversary wishes for your wife offers the perfect solution.
- “Happy anniversary from the best thing that ever happened to you.” – Anonymous
- “I love waking up next to you in the morning. Just don’t breathe on me.” – Anonymous
- “Every heart sings a song, incomplete, until another heart whispers back. Those who wish to sing always find a song. At the touch of a lover, everyone becomes a poet.” – Plato. We may not always sing in tune, but I would not trade the music that we make for anything – happy anniversary!
- “Let’s celebrate the day you gave up on finding anyone better than me. Happy anniversary!” – Anonymous
- “Marriage is like vitamins; we supplement each other’s minimum daily requirements.” – Anonymous. Happy anniversary, my love!
- “You are the seat belt in the roller coaster of my life.” – Anonymous. Thank you for protecting me at every turn, and through all of the ups and downs of life, my dear wife. You are so special to me. Happy anniversary!
- “I was thinking of going to the bakery, but I already have the sweetest thing in the world at home.” – Anonymous. Happy anniversary to you, my sweetest love.
- “Marriage is a circus.” – Anonymous. You are my favourite clown. Happy anniversary to you, my love!
- “My husband said he needed some space – so I locked him outside!” – Anonymous. Thank you for not locking me out. Happy anniversary to you, my beloved.
- “In my house, I am the boss. My wife is just the decision maker.” – Woody Allen. Thank you for making the best decisions for us both. Happy anniversary, I love you!
Funny Anniversary Wishes For Parents
For many of us, the first real display of love that we ever experienced or witnessed was between our parents. As their love continues to grow and change in different ways over the years, every anniversary becomes increasingly important and inspiring.
Finding the right words to wish them with may be a bit daunting at first – but fear not. We have put together a list of funny anniversary quotes for parents to help you make the occasion that much more special.
- “Your relationship taught me how to trust, how to love and how to take care of the people around me. It taught me how to stay strong and courageous when things get hard. Your marriage taught me the meaning of true love.” – Anonymous. Thank you for continuing to teach us every day, no matter how old we get! Happy anniversary to my wonderful parents.
- “Love is a battlefield.” – Pat Benatar. You two keep winning! Happy anniversary to my sweet parents.
- “Being married is like having a best friend who doesn’t remember a single thing that you say.” – Anonymous. Happy anniversary to you two. Watching you as each other’s best friends has taught us all so much about love, patience and kindness. We love you!
- “Never laugh at your wife’s choices. You are one of them.” – Anonymous. Thank you for choosing each other and for teaching us how to love. Happy anniversary! Here’s to another year of fun and laughter.
- “I couldn’t imagine where I’d be without the two of you – literally!” – Anonymous. Happiest of anniversaries to my wonderful and amazing parents. Here is to many more incredible years of joy, happiness and laughter.
- “The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart.” – Helen Keller. Happy anniversary to you two. Thank you for showing us all some of the best and most beautiful things.
- “There’s no substitute for a great love who says, ‘No matter what’s wrong with you, you are welcome at this table.’ – Tom Hanks. Thank you for showing us how to welcome others to the table. Happy anniversary, mom and dad!
- “True love doesn’t happen right away; it’s an ever-growing process. It develops after you’ve gone through many ups and downs, when you’ve suffered together, cried together, laughed together.” – Ricardo Montalban. Happiest anniversary to you, mom and dad! Thank you for everything you have done for us and thank you for continuing to inspire us every single day.
- “You make it look so easy annoying someone for eternity!” – Anonymous. Happy anniversary, mom and dad! We wish you every happiness in the coming year and beyond.
- “Marriage makes you crazy.” – Anonymous. You two are totally insane! Happy, happy anniversary to my wonderful parents. May the coming year bring you plenty of laughter, joy and happiness. I love you to the moon and back.
- “The longer two people stay together, the more they look like each other.” – Anonymous. Hopefully mom won’t grow a matching beard, dad. Happy anniversary to you two lovebirds. Thank you for inspiring all of us!
- “They say marriage makes you live longer – this must be true, because you two have been married for eternity. Here’s to forever, mom and dad! Happy anniversary!”
Finding the perfect quotes and wishes for anniversaries is never easy, but when you do, you strike gold!
Why not make it funny by adding a joke here and there? It will make the special couple’s day all the more memorable and will give them something to have a giggle at for years to come!